Hawnjigs
KISS
Might be old hat, but thought this was a hoot !
"The two most important events in all of history were the invention of beer
and the invention of the wheel. Beer required grain and that was the
beginning of agriculture.
Neither the glass bottle nor aluminum can were invented yet, so while our
early humans were sitting around waiting for them to be invented, they just
stayed close to the brewery. That's how villages were formed.
The wheel was invented to get man to the beer and vice versa. These two were
the foundation of modern civilization and together were the catalyst for the
splitting of humanity into two distinct subgroups:
1. Liberals.
2. Conservatives.
Some men spent their days tracking and killing animals to BBQ at night while
they were drinking beer. This was the beginning of what is known as the
Conservative movement.
Other men who were less skilled at hunting (called 'vegetarians' which was
an early human word meaning 'bad hunter') learned to live off the
Conservatives by showing up for the nightly BBQ's and doing the sewing,
fetching, and hairdressing. This was the beginning of the liberal movement.
Some of these liberal men evolved into women. Others became known as
girlie-men. Some noteworthy liberal achievements include the domestication
of cats, the invention of group therapy, group hugs, and the concept of
democratic voting to decide how to divide the meat and beer that
Conservatives provided.
Over the years Conservatives came to be symbolized by the largest, most
powerful land animal on earth, the elephant. Liberals are symbolized by the
jackass for obvious reasons."
"The two most important events in all of history were the invention of beer
and the invention of the wheel. Beer required grain and that was the
beginning of agriculture.
Neither the glass bottle nor aluminum can were invented yet, so while our
early humans were sitting around waiting for them to be invented, they just
stayed close to the brewery. That's how villages were formed.
The wheel was invented to get man to the beer and vice versa. These two were
the foundation of modern civilization and together were the catalyst for the
splitting of humanity into two distinct subgroups:
1. Liberals.
2. Conservatives.
Some men spent their days tracking and killing animals to BBQ at night while
they were drinking beer. This was the beginning of what is known as the
Conservative movement.
Other men who were less skilled at hunting (called 'vegetarians' which was
an early human word meaning 'bad hunter') learned to live off the
Conservatives by showing up for the nightly BBQ's and doing the sewing,
fetching, and hairdressing. This was the beginning of the liberal movement.
Some of these liberal men evolved into women. Others became known as
girlie-men. Some noteworthy liberal achievements include the domestication
of cats, the invention of group therapy, group hugs, and the concept of
democratic voting to decide how to divide the meat and beer that
Conservatives provided.
Over the years Conservatives came to be symbolized by the largest, most
powerful land animal on earth, the elephant. Liberals are symbolized by the
jackass for obvious reasons."
